Moments
by Sara Loui
Summary: Jacks POV of his relationship with Carter from her meeting Pete onwards. Spoilers for the end of seson seven. R&R as always please.
1. Default Chapter

Title: Moments

Author: sara lou

Category: Missing scenes

Pairing: Jack/Sam

Rating: G

Synopsis: Jack analyses his relationship with Carter from the moment of her telling him of Pete.  
Notes: Not Beta'd so all mistakes are mine. Please R&R, I decided season seven gave us shippers enough moments between Jack and Sam worthy of a fic, not sure of what I came up with but hope you enjoy.  
Spoilers: season seven episodes 'Chimera', 'Death knell', 'Heroes pt2', 'The lost city pt 1&2'.

Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Sci Fi Channel, Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. No copyright infringement whatsoever is intended. The story is for entertainment purposes only. The original characters, situations and story are mine.

Moments

'I'm just happy your happy about something other than...Quarks'

Jack cringed as he headed down the hallway away from the elevator. Had he just said that? Uncomfortable wasn't the word. He often wondered to himself why after five years they hadn't 'gotten over it'.

Maybe they were over it. Carter certainly seemed to be moving on. She'd hummed, he'd never heard her hum before, the tune certainly was questionable, perhaps her happy thoughts tune.

"Her happy thoughts tune?"

"Sir?" asked Siler pausing as they passed each other.

Jack realised he had spoken aloud, ducked his head and continued on his merry way without anymore acknowledgement on his comment.

Things had changed since the incident of the disappearance of the Prometheus. Boy had he had to keep himself together on that one. Trust Tealc, the all seeing all wisdomful jaffa to notice his concerns. He knew Daniel had noticed too but Daniel was wise enough to know such things weren't spoken of. Tealc seemed to forgo that part of wisdom and make Jack admit something was up, be it in silence or a torrent of words.

Carter hadn't spoken much of what had happened, she'd been vague in the briefing, outlining only what was necessary both when giving an explanation and in her official report. It read as textbook, giving all the actual details without giving details. She was a master of giving enough information as was necessary in these situations. Jack often wondered why she always felt it necessary to explain at great length some scientific point at most in-opportune times, yet was a pro at de-briefs outlining missions for Hammond with ease, answering simply and in layman's turns at each point to his every question.

Jack knew there was more to the situation, but couldn't quite put his finger on what. He couldn't flaw her explanation, or her recall of the events, which took place. She'd encountered an alien entity, which had in turn caused her to create in her mind figments of her imagination, in this case those close to her such as the rest of SG-1 and her father. In this way, she had been able to figure out the predicament the Prometheus was in and managed to save them from a dire situation. She had pondered to the alien's existence and assumed the child 'Grace' was the alien entity, perhaps appearing as a child to validate it's innocence.

Things had been fine, quiet on the missions, nothing untoward, just basic exploration. Carter was back to her normal self, and nothing had been spoken on the matter of the Prometheus mission since. The only thing Jack really noticed was a slight change in her social time. Usually she spent hours cooped up in her lab, as was her right, researching of tweaking with some weird device. As of late she'd spent less time in the lab or the mountain, now he knew why. Jack couldn't flaw her for following orders eventually.


	2. 2

"How's Pete?"

'Yeah, I know, I'm as surprised as you that I'm asking' thought Jack catching the off guard surprise face Carter gave him. She seemed to be distracted and he couldn't help but get the feeling Pete was the distraction. Sam gave him a weak shrug.

" You know how it is. Usually you don't let it bother you because you know that they couldn't cope with the truth anyway."

"Usually."

'There were times I felt the same about telling things to Sarah, but that's water under the bridge now ain't it'

"I think he could have."

Jack knew exactly what she was talking about; he'd been there a million times before with various missions he'd gone on when he'd been with his ex wife. It was a tough decision to make, but it was part of the job they were in. As he left her lab Jack couldn't help but realise this was more than a passing fling; Carter must be very serious about the guy if she wanted to tell him about the Stargate Program.

Jack pushed it from his mind in preparation for the upcoming mission concerning Daniel, but they were thoughts he couldn't easily shake and he knew they would be there for a while to come. 


	3. 3

Jack stood shakily and tried to sum up the situation, which he knew had gone not according to plan as he felt the aching pain going through his back from the force he'd been thrown back. Grabbing his weapon he headed toward the commotion, he could hear going on outside. This was going to be one hell of a cleanup job. Hearing shots, he edged towards the doorway eyeing the back of Osiris. Billowing smoke was issuing from what was left of the surveillance van, across the road and he could see figures crouching nearby it, he summarised one was that of Carter, the other he didn't recognise. He took his chance and took it; watching as the dart hit home and Osiris crumpled to the ground. With the primary target finally taken down, he approached Carter who was crouching over the other figure.

"Carter!" "It's Pete. He needs an ambulance!"

Carter ducked her head down and continued to talk to Pete as Jack looked on before turning back to Tealc who was poised ready to take Osiris down again if need be. Daniel had found his legs and was on the telephone calling in the cavalry. Jack could only wonder as to why and how Pete had managed to present himself into the middle of their mission.

It would be a good few hours before he got his answer. Pete had been brought into the SGC, and treated, Sam had stood mostly impatiently as Janet and nurses had attended to him. They had de-briefed with Hammond and Daniel had departed to be with Osiris...Sarah, the procedure was going ahead on that score concerning getting the snake out of her.

Jack still had not had a chance to scout the guy out for himself; he'd caught a glimpse of Shanahan when they brought him in but he hadn't had a chance to talk to him and doubted he would before he was discharged. Carter had requested a meeting with Hammond after the debrief and Jack suspected they were talking about Pete's involvement. He had been proven right as the General had asked him into his office as Carter had departed with a much more at ease demeanour.

"I've decided to give Major Carter the go ahead in telling Detective Shanahan about the stargate program. She will be disclosing information about the SGC this evening"

"You think that's wise Sir?"

"You don't?"

"I think its dangerous any amount of people knowing about the program"

"I have my concerns. As I said I've asked Major Carter not to disclose anything until this evening at least, although I'm quite happy with my decision I am running some checks on his background. Major Carter seems more at ease knowing she can tell him the truth. He saw enough not to be able to feed him any story we may have been able to come up with concerning the situation."

"Carter told me she thought he could handle the truth, it seems to have been a concern of hers keeping the whole truth from him"

"It's not the easiest thing to keep this from the people we care about. It can cause a strain to relationships. Major Carter was quite professional as always in looking at the pros and cons of disclosing this information to him"

"I wouldn't have expected anything else from her Sir"

"Good, I wanted you to know, as her commanding officer as well as her friend I feel she may need your full support in this"

"Yes Sir"

Things started to go back to normal after a few months. Jack had gotten used to the idea of Carter 'dating'. Not so much 'dating' as having a 'boyfriend'. Things hadn't completely changed at work, but a small wedge had seemed to settle between them, not big enough to change their dynamic but there all the same. In the following months she'd seemed happier, more at ease and spent less time in her lab than he'd ever known. Jack found he had been ordering Daniel home more often and Carter less. They had all been fully supportive of Carter and Pete, wished her all the happiness the relationship could bring. They had still to meet him formally, although they'd all been introduced before he'd been set loose from Janet and her minions. 

Jack found himself settling into the happy routine, he finally found some sort of closure on the whole situation. Carter was moving on, and he could truthfully say he was happy that she was happy. 


	4. 4

Carter was offworld at the alpha site running research with Jacob Carter. That's when routine had decided to take a U-turn. The rest of Sg-1 had found themselves standing in the middle of devastation, the crater that was left of the Alpha site. They had met up with Reynolds team.

"So we'll split up, search for survivors."

'If there are any' Jack thought to himself 'Carters resourceful, so is Jacob. Hell all these people were, some of them must have gotten to safety.

"Who could have survived this?" asked Reynolds, with an unconvinced look around the bombsite they stood in. 

Jack shot him a look, they had to stay positive, and there must be survivors.

"Start with the treeline there" he pointed and gave Reynolds a look of 'don't stop until you find someone' Reynolds read the look perfectly.

"Copy"

"Move out"

As they continued their search Jack's radio crackled.

"O'Neill"

"Go ahead"

"We found twelve survivors but they're not in good shape"

"How bad"

"Some can walk, but most need immediate medical treatment"

'Thank god' thought Jack, pausing with slight relief before his thoughts paused and he asked in concern.

"Major Carter with them?"

Reynolds seemed to take forever in answering, Jack knew the answer before it crackled through to him. He felt his heart sink and avoided eye contact with Tealc and Daniel, knowing he'd read similar faces on them.

"I'm afraid not." Came the reply.

Jack refused to give up hope, even thought they had been searching for hours. They been going round in a search pattern, following the tracks of both what they assumed were Carters and the drones. The fact that there were continuous tracks gave him some peace of mind. He just hoped they got there before anything serious happened.

'We'll cross that bridge when we come to it' thought Jack, they certainly would. The weapon would be effective, Carter would be alive and they would use the prototype she had on her.

They heard the explosion, a loud cracking sound to the east of them, instinct made them run toward it, readying their weapons. Jack was relived Tealc was with him, both determined to take this thing down. Jack could see a shadow starting to emerge from the billowing dust and followed its line of shot to see Carter crouching behind a rock. Taking fire he broke off from Tealc who was trying to keep the drones attention.

Adrenaline pushed all relief at seeing Carter alive and well from his mind as he reached her, he needed to take this thing down or none of them would survive it.

"Carter I need the..."

He paused as Carter; already way ahead of him raised her hand and handed him the new weapons insert. Giving her a rushed thanks, he loaded the weapon and quickly fired taking down the drone and ridding them of the imminent danger. Jack took a breath, exhausted but not as exhausted as Carter who looked barely able to walk. He didn't want to imagine what she'd gone through with this thing chasing her around the planet.

"Is it?"

"Yeah, he's dead...Right Teal'c, he's dead?"

Jack looked from Carter to Tealc; double checking for himself and watching as Tealc gave the soldier a stern kick weapon raised. Jack felt himself holding his breath as tealc did so. When the soldier didn't respond, Jack let the breath out and looked back to Carter

"Yeah, he's dead. You wanna get up?"

Stupid question, Carter looked barely able to stand, but the less time they spent here the better for him. If another soldier was around he didn't want to be the one to welcome it. Still concern overcame him as Carter shook her head wearily.

"I just need to rest for a minute"

Carter looked about to collapse and dropped her eyes, unable to cope with the overwhelming relief of seeing both he and Tealc. Jack watched her taking a breath, watching he emotions of relief and fatigue crossing her face. She needed someone and at that, moment it was him, and he felt compelled to hold her, just hold her and reassure her everything was all right.

"Come here"

Sam looked at him with slight surprise as Jack stretched out an arm and wrapped it around her shoulders pulling her to him to rest, protected. He felt her melt into the space he created, it felt comfortable, right, so right, perfect even in the situation they had been in. Jack knew it was a feeling that couldn't last. 


	5. 5

Jack sat in the small room of the infirmary and wondered when it had all gone wrong. He could remember the firing, remembered the blast, remembered it hell he felt it. Still could, he'd be tender for a few days but nothing too critical. He sat and shook his head for a moment. They'd lost Janet; he couldn't get his head around it. Janet Frasier how the hell had that happen? How had he been spared and not Frasier? God damned crossfire. Jack had lost people in the field, hundreds of men and women he'd known fine officers. However, this one hit home a little too much for comfort. His thoughts had gone from Cassie, to Carter to the whole base in one fleeting second. An ominous atmosphere had settled over the base. The death of Janet Frasier had affected everyone, and they'd lost many good people out there in this battle, but Janet, her death seemed too much to bear.

Jack stood; he'd been dismissed with the order of taking some downtime and definitely off field duty until the wound was fully healed. As he reached for his clothing, the door opened admitting Carter. He felt guilty for the relief he'd felt knowing she as well and Daniel and Tealc had gotten out alive. He acknowledged her presence as he pulled on his t-shirt.

"Sir heard you were up and around" she seemed a little uncomfortable but closed the door behind her as if shutting out the base for a moment escaping the impending depression of every man and woman on base.

"Yeah ... err...still a little tender but they said I could go home"

"We're lucky that staff blast hit you where it did. That new vest inserts works well" she didn't sound too impressed.

"Didn't help Frasier much"

Jack regretted saying it, but it had needed to be said. Again the thought of why Janet and not him or any other person who had left the field alive crossed his mind. He watched as Sam took a breath dropping her eyes for a moment.

"No"

"How's Cassie?"

"She's a strong kid, she survives ... you know."

"Yeah" replied Jack, pulling on his shirt. Cassie had lost two mothers, both in extreme circumstances. Jack wondered how in the hell she could cope with that and made a mental note to get in touch himself as soon as he could. A moment silence entered between them before he continued.

"You speaking at the memorial?" He knew she was but he felt the silence could become too much, something was hanging between them and he wasn't sure he wanted to go there.

"Sir ... I ... I just wanted to say" he watched the way she licked her lips, watched the cogs whirring in her mind, wondering whether she should continue. Carter had decided she would go there, trust her to take the higher ground and make them deal with it.

"When you were lying there I..." he could see the glint of tears, he was fighting back his own. Still he couldn't move, although the want to hold her was overtaking again.

"I'm really glad you're okay."

Jack allowed the compulsion to move closer overtake him. She wasn't the only one feeling relief; he wanted to comfort her. He knew what she was admitting, within those four walls she knew she could and he wouldn't judge her. Jack could read the guilt lining her voice, that although the death of Janet caused great pain she was happy he was alive. Sam glanced up at him as he came closer and all he could do in that tiny room was pull her close, letting her know maybe not so much in words but in action that he felt exactly the same way. He held her close and tight. For a moment, Jack knew what if would be like to help push her pain away. For a second time, he knew it was a feeling that couldn't last. 


	6. 6

It was supposed to get easier, yet as Jack stood in his kitchen, wondering about the future he could only frown over the last few months when it came to analysing that relationship. He thought things had settled down, feelings had truly been buried, pushed away. They'd found their niche and were happy to live with it. But all of a sudden, six months ago, things had changed and everything had seemed to go haywire. Ever since the Prometheus had gone off course and Carter had been MIA. 

Jack knew he should be thinking on other things, he'd just allowed his head to be sucked by one of those ancient devices the day before. He had tossed and turned in bed and ended up going on the roof, his thoughts crossing over everything. Last time he'd done this he'd barely gotten out alive. He was unsure how it would all turn out this time. 

A knock at his door shook him from his thoughts and he glanced at the clock on the wall. He had been wondering who the first would be to arrive, but was still surprised when he opened the door and saw the person who had currently been in his thoughts standing there.

"Hi Sir"

"Carter?"

"Did I wake you?"

"Sorta"

"I couldn't sleep at all last night"

"You should have called"

'Really you should have called' thought Jack, 'better still you should have come over'

"I didn't wanna bother you"

Jack opened the door wider, allowing her access into the hall.

"I was just looking at the sky. Trying to figure out how many stars we'd actually been to"

"Actually, only a few of the stars visible from Earth have Stargates on them, so....."

"I knew that"

"Yeah"

"Hammond send you by to check up on me?"

"It's funny really, I was out driving, you know....in my car, and I um,I drove here.Yeah ..."

'Yeah we're two grown adults acting like we don't really havent known each other for seven years thought Jack deciding to add to the already growing tension he refused to admit was starting up sparks.

"Funny."

"There's coffee around here," said Jack turning to the kitchen as Sam made herself at home. 

He frowned and decided on a better way of perhaps keeping her around, that something that would relax them a little and perhaps make them face some facts

" Maybe not. How about a beer?"

"Sure, why not." Came the reply from the confines of the living area. 

"Want a glass? I can wash one"

"No, I'm fine, thank you sir" replied Sam, suddenly looking at a loss as she took her beer, she turned to the pictures on the shelf pointing to one of himself and Sara "do you ever talk to her?"

"Can we not talk about that?"

'If we can't talk about our relationship, I sure as hell don't want to talk about that one' thought Jack, looking at the woman standing in front of him.

"Sorry. How are you feeling?" "Can we not talk about that either?"

Jack knew he was giving out not the best vibes, to approach any subject of 'us' but decided he was entitled to be a little awkward given his situation concerning his health. Stepping around Carter he settled himself on the sofa and turned his eyes to her.

"Ok, what do you want to talk about?"

Jack thought for a moment, thousands of scenarios of conversations crossing his mind. All of them forbidden yet, he was starting the think to hell with it, if anything bad came of it he could always put it down to having his head sucked. Carter however didn't feel as comfortable as he was getting about the situation.

"You wanna be alone." Said Sam, setting down her beer and preparing to leave "This was a bad I ... I ... should go."

"Finish your beer, and then you have to wait at least an hour before you drive."

Jack wondered if he sounded as at ease as he intended, flicking his bottle cap across the room as he spoke and hoping she'd take him up on the offer. He was happy enough when she settled down close beside him.

"Sir?"

"What?"

"I should have done it"

Too hell with that idea, he wasn't prepared to let anyone get their head sucked, especially not Carter. It was bad enough going through what it did to you, he wasn't sure he could take on everybody else's role of sitting and watching it happen unable to do anything about it.

"What? Stuck your head in that thing? Are you nuts? Carter. You're one of this countries natural resources. If not National treasures. It couldn't have gone down any other way. I just hope it's worth it."

"Even if we do find the Lost City. Even if we get there and find exactly what we're looking for to defend the planet...."

"THAT ... would be worth it."

It had to be worth it, he had felt the instinct to do this, he would make sure he had done it for something. He wasn't going to go through this, put everyone through this for nothing. Things were settling, things were starting to ease, he watched her, another moment. Seems too many moments seemed to be cropping up on him, those moments where he forgot she was off limits, not just because of rules and regulations but because she'd finally made the decision to move on with her life. Still there was something between them, something neither wanted to admit too. And now she had more to lose. They were interrupted by a knock of 'shave and haircut' at the door. Sam looked at him a little startled at the interruption; Jack could only look at her with a soft look as he heard the front door open softly.

" Hello!?" came Daniel's voice from down the hall

Jack raised a brow giving Sam a look, only for it to be returned with a wide smile.

"In here." Jack shouted through to Daniel, keeping eye contact with Sam all the while, knowing the opportunity had passed.

"Oh sorry, are we interrupting anything?"

"No" exclaimed both Jack and Sam turning their attention to Daniel and seeing Tealc at the hallway, box in hand. 


	7. 7

'God I hate it when this happens, I'm in here, just not. This is when I regret not saying what I wanted to say. What needed to be said? To all of you, to everyone.' Jack felt life seeping from him, literally, it was a strange experience, and he'd felt it for a moment when he lay on the floor of the Asguard homeworld. When it all became too much. He could just focus on her; Sam was calling for him, trying to get his attention. So much to say and no way of saying it.

"Sir? Sir."

Jack could feel the warmth of her fingers pressing into his neck. 'Hey I'm still here'

"His pulse is erratic. Don't you dare leave us now. We won"

Jack tried to open his eyes, something was happening, they had won but it was too late for him, he'd played his part it was up to them to ride out the rest. He focused on Sam, she was close calling to him, they'd won.

'Of course we won, we always win' thought Jack 'that's our job. Wish I could see the end of it; wish I could tell you all the things that need saying. Will I ever get the chance? You know don't you Sam, deep down we both know. We just need to be courageous enough to say it aloud. We can kick ass saving the world but we can't be two adults and admit what's between us'

"Please Jack"

She was close, so close, Jack begged for the strength to lift a hand and comfort the loss he could already see in her eyes as she looked on him, pleading in her voice for him to hold on. She still had hope, still had faith that something could be done.

"Dolmata" he whispered, there was something, not the best option, but it would stop him from slipping away, he didn't want to ebb away. It wasn't going to go down like that. 

He lost sight of her as Tealc overtook and lifted him, setting him safely inside. He could feel the powers seeping through him, activating the device. He focused again on Carter; another moment he could never have again, the last moment as life suddenly became still.

Finis 


End file.
